An Aussie family with two early teen boys was eating lunch out of Tupperware half way up to the fortress on the hill overlooking Kotor in Montenegro the other day. I’ll admit it. I had some judgment for that mom. Who brings Tupperware half way around the world? And, to Montenegro of all places, which happens to have cheap and wonderful food (heavily influenced by the Italian neighbors). Needless to say, the amusing little family tableau was riveting to all who paused.
The drama featured the youngest son who agreed with me. (Why is it always so funny when SOMEBODY ELSE’S twelve year old kid is whining about their lunch choices?) It seems that Skippy wasn’t overly fond of the packed lunch, sammies with a thin dark substance smeared onto pasty looking white bread. Who can blame him? The older boy, (goodie-goodie, certainly mom’s “favorite”) was dutifully chomping away while his black-sheep brother, (probably the genetic recipient of all that convict DNA) gave both parents a real hard time about something called “Marmite”. (Never heard of it, but it didn’t sound good.)
Fast forward. (The Aussie kid is probably in protective custody by now) – right through the Balkans and London and find me in a city “apartment” in Edinburgh where, as part of the continental breakfast, there appears a jar of, yep…Marmite. Well, my friends, intrepid world traveller that I am, in possession of an abiding curiosity of foreign cultures, (okay, truthfully foreign FOOD), I quickly unscrewed the cap and took a big whiff. Now, if you have experience yourself with this “food” product, you will understand why I came perilously close to tossing my cookies right the fuck into the morning bread basket. The only thing I’ve ever smelled that comes close to describing the aroma of Marmite is a product involving fish emulsion that I used to dilute and apply to house plants. WTF? People in Australia willingly feed this to their children???
From the Marmite label: Marmite Yeast Extract is rich in B vitamins and 100% vegetarian. (It has that going for it.) Furthermore it is manufactured by Unilever in London. I know I’ll piss off a few Brits, but, what the hell…any food made by the British is going to be somewhat suspect to start with, but isn’t Unilever a corporate entity known primarily for making and selling cleaning products? (I could be wrong and I know the citizens of England will inform.) The label proudly boasts that Marmite is primarily composed of “yeast Extract, vegetable extract, spice extract”.
I really hadn’t considered this topic worthy of a Desto3 postcard, then, yesterday, driving from Edinburgh to Inverness, (Scotland) we stopped for a short tour in Stirling and wandered into a little café. (Check trip notes.) While I waited for my Panini I picked up the newspaper. There was an article on page 5 about the hubbub surrounding the release of “Marmite cupcakes”. Apparently, following the craze (and by that, in my opinion, I mean cra-zee) that has folks putting bacon into all manner of sweets, (chocolate chip cookies and the like), some culinary genius in Britain (ha!) has decided that chocolate cupcakes have been just begging for an injection to their center of Marmite. Kind of like the venerable Hostess cupcakes only, NOT.
The article says that the release of these goodies will be short term, only available for two months in limited quantity, and they fully expect that folks will either “love them or hate them”. (I vote hate.) Reactions will be likely based on your “baseline Marmite sensibilities”. I kid not.
It’s my job to travel and taste so you don’t have to. But, don’t thank me. Exhortations to contact the makers at Unilever with your questions is right there on the label: “the Marmite loveline” (toll free at least) 0800 0323656.
